Sex IS NOT Love

sex is not love

Why does our ‘traditional’ society say that in order to save a marriage the woman must ‘give’ good sex to the man? Are they trying to equate sex with love? They honestly feel that sex will save a relationship when there no love remaining? Does love mean sex? Or does sex mean love? What’s the interconnection? Is the correlation really there or is it a spurious one?

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The Hungry Kiss

hungry kiss

He grabbed her by the back of her neck and smashed his lips on hers.

There are so many types of kissing, ways of kissing, perfect moments when couples should kiss, benefits of kissing blah blah blah. Nothing matches up to the hungry kiss. It leaves you completely blank in the head. So much that you are even unable to even respond to the kiss.

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Erotica Is Art; Pornography Is Tart

erotica Khajuraho temples

I had a huge debate with my friend the other day on whether erotica was the same as pornography. As the post will tell you, I most definitely think that it’s not.

Even though both have to do with human sexuality, they are on different planes altogether. Whenever erotica is spoken about, to the mind comes various forms of art – sculpture, painting, literature, movies, photography etc. It is about the way that the body of a human or the act of making love is described with a certain degree of beauty. Erotica is more aesthetic and creative because it depicts and artist’s perception of what he considers to be attractive or sensual. 

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Have Your Felt The Jolt?


Why is it that one person’s squeeze-the-breath-out-of-me hug feels brotherly. Ok at most friendly. And another’s barely-touch-the tip-of-my-little-finger’s-nail jolts the shit out of you? Is it all in the head? Hidden in the feelings? A hormonal reaction?

I am on a ‘hunt for an answer to this’ mission today.  Let’s see what answers some research reveals.

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I’m In Love With Your Husband

extra marital affair

You really can’t help falling in love, can you? So often, we decide to fall for someone who we know, right from the beginning, is not right. And yet, we go ahead and do it. So too, happened to a relative of mine. She fell in love with a married man. 

I don’t know if ‘agony aunt’ is written on my face or not, but she came to me for relationship advice, like so many in the past have done. While the best advice that I could have given her would have been to ask her to stay away, I didn’t do that. Instead I just warned her about what she would have to deal with once the thrill of the initial sex was over and the libido was back to normal. The ball was then in her court – literally! She was the one who would have to make the decision if she wanted to continue the secret adventure or walk away.

Here’s what I told her.

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Are You Sure It Is Love?


“I love you.”

“You are my life.”

“I won’t be able to live with you.”

Sounds familiar? I’m sure! It’s been said by millions for the past so many years. But watch out for the signs I’m going to talk about. If you think your relationship have these, then stay away. Unless you want what ‘your man’ wants too – S.E.X.!

Yes, these are the signs that you are in a relationship where the guy is all out to have a good time with you in bed. Or maybe the shower! Umm, well alright, maybe even the back seat of the car. But love? Nopes. That doesn’t exist.

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It Is Not As Much Fun As It Appears To Be


I love my blog. It allows me to write about whatever is on my mind without bothering about whether people will judge me or not. Not that I ever cared much about being judged. The shy girl at school had changed into a rebellious woman while at college 🙂 I thought age would quieten me a bit. But it seems that it hasn’t. When I feel strongly about something or if something is on my mind, I feel this intense urge to vent it out. This piece is one such.

The other day on the radio I heard an RJ saying that an interviewer had asked Sunny Leone whether she had ever had a one night stand or not. It’s a different thing that she had given an answer (and that too a smart one), but the point is, aren’t such questions a tad too personal? I mean, would one dare to ask Priyanka Chopra when she had last made love? Or ask Katrina Kaif if Salman was better than Ranbir in bed? Then why Sunny? I’m not about to start a battle here. But I personally think that just because she has done pornography, it in no way gives permission to the media to overstep their boundaries. She’s just doing her job!

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Make Some Noise

sex, noisy sex

Researchers have found that in the jungle female chimpanzees make different kinds of copulatory calls to attract the males. But we are not chimpanzees or anyone from their family! Well, at least not anymore. Remember evolution? So, do we women need to make noises in bed during copulation? For a change the men answered. 

This is a relationship blog and hence this topic had to be done some time or the other. It took me guts to get started on this. But I’m happy I did it. If not for the information that I gathered, then most definitely for being able to get rid of the stupid taboo in my head that often prevents me from talking about sex with members of the opposite gender without feeling awkward. I know that I will be able to write more freely about this henceforth. And write I will.

As for you readers out there, please don’t read this one if you are going to be looking at the topic with raised brows. If you want to be judgemental and appear ‘proper’ then I suggest you shut this one down RIGHT NOW!

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I Don’t Like This Position

compromise, sex, marriage, relationship

Those who know me well are already a little (OK more than a little) shocked at the ‘bold’ blog posts that are being written by me. Some have told me that I have changed. I don’t know if that’s for the good or for the worse because that hasn’t been spelled out to me. People love being vague. However, it doesn’t really matter because I am happy this way. There’s got to be somewhere or to someone where one can rant out everything. And this is where I do it.

This post, however, even if the title is suggestive of it, won’t be about the ‘various positions’. I could give a detailed sermon on it but so could Google. So I will let sexual positions be for the time being. 😉

What is this ‘position’ then that’s of interest to me. It’s the ever compromising position that the woman faces in this oh-so-traditional Indian society of ours. 

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Sex – Only A Three Letter Word Now?

sex, relationship, intercourse

Recently I have been speaking to way too many women who have confided in me that for them sex is just an act. It is not something that they look forward to or something that they enjoy. Woah! Really? Why?

Why is it that so many women out there lie there on their beds every night with their legs apart as the man penetrate them – and they don’t feel a thing?

These are married couples. They love their spouses and so want to give them pleasure. But they get nothing in return. Probably this lot is worse off than those who sell their bodies – at least they get money in return.


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